Embracing Visibility: Breaking Free from the Push and Pull
Last weekend I felt triggered. After posting a photo of me on social media on the way to meet some friends someone commented that this was 'just another selfie opportunity' for me. I felt an internal jolt, that old familiar feeling 'I need to take the photo down, no-one wants to see me, I need to try and hide myself again'.
Do you ever find yourself yearning to be seen, but at the same time struggling with the idea of being visible? It's like a constant tug-of-war within, a 'push me pull you' kind of battle that creates an internal conflict. I understand this struggle all too well. For most of my life, I desperately longed to be seen, driven by deep-rooted insecurities that arose from complex childhood traumas. I never felt seen, heard, or valued—I questioned whether I truly mattered.
Yet, paradoxically, I was also terrified of being seen. For a long time, negative core beliefs plagued my mind, creating a distorted image of who I truly am. These beliefs led me to believe that I was inherently flawed, that I wasn't worthy of love or acceptance, and that my thoughts and opinions held no value.
Every time I summoned the courage to embrace my authentic self and step into the spotlight, panic would seize me, acting as a protective mechanism. In response, I would try to shrink myself, hiding from the world. I constructed an identity based on these false beliefs, believing that it was safer to present myself in a way that aligned with these negative narratives. But deep down, I knew that it wasn't working and it was exhausting pretending to be someone I wasn't.
As an adult, it was challenging because my work meant that I needed to be visible but I was still afraid to be seen. Social media is how a lot of women find me to come and work with me on my transformational programmes and retreats and 121 sessions and so I had to find a way to 'feel the fear and do it anyway' - do you ever feel like that when you are called to be more visible in your work?
I embarked on a transformative journey, one that involved peeling back the layers of insecurity and trauma. With each layer uncovered, I allowed myself to become more visible, not just as a leader, but as a confident, authentic, compassionate, and purpose-driven woman.
This journey has not been easy, but has been so worth it. It has required resilience, self-reflection, and a commitment to personal growth. I've had to confront those negative core beliefs head-on, challenging their validity and replacing them with empowering truths. I've learned that there is nothing inherently wrong with me, that I am worthy of love, and that my voice holds tremendous value.
And so last weekend felt like a little test when I felt that old familiar jolt at the comment someone left on my Facebook post,. Instead of giving in to the fear, I took a deep breath, reminded myself that it's ok for me to be seen just as I am and that other people have the right to think whatever they like , without their views impacting on my self-worth. I went on to have a wonderful weekend with friends.
I want to encourage you to embrace your own visibility. It's time to break free from self-doubt and fear. Let your light shine brightly, showing the way for others to follow. Lead with confidence, authenticity, compassion, and purpose. Your unique perspective, your voice, and your leadership have incredible power and you deserve to be seen and heard, just as you are.
Together, let's create a world where women leaders are seen, heard, and valued for their contributions. It's time to unleash our power and make a real difference. The world is eagerly waiting for us to step into our greatness. Will you join us on the Self-Worth Revolution for Women Leaders? Click here.